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Normally when I find two verses in a passage that seem to fit together, I share the entire passage, including the verses in between. Today’s doesn’t work that way, because that is the nature of the book of Proverbs. Most of this book is a series of one-off pieces of wisdom. Sometimes they tie together, and sometimes they are a list of things to either do or not do. These come from Proverbs chapter 14. First verse 10:
The heart knows its own bitterness,
and no stranger shares its joy.
And then verse 13:
Even in laughter the heart may ache,
and the end of joy may be grief.
These two verses could describe 90% of what goes on for me emotionally on any given day. The first seems to cover all my introverted nature. I don’t choose to share what’s on my heart very easily, and it certainly is not something I share with strangers. Moreover, I find it easier to share my innermost thoughts in writing than I do out loud. There is something scary about speaking aloud for me that I don’t find in writing my thoughts.
The second verse is my life of the last two and a half years. I move back and forth between joy and grief so easily. I can one moment be laughing and the next, wanting to cry. Pure joy is rare, and is often followed by deep sorrow. It’s secondhand to those of us who have buried children. From what I’ve observed, those who have lost a spouse experience it also, as well as perhaps those who have lost parents (though refer to verse 10 above for how I could be wrong about this since I have not experienced either loss).
Some days are easier than others. Lately grief has been inserting itself into my life more frequently, and it makes writing this blog a lot harder. Thanks for sticking with me through this.
Blooming Joy! 
Dear Sweet Mom,
I have been reading your blog since the illness of your beautiful gal and have often prayed for you. I feel moved today to let you know you are in my prayers and I pray the great comforter will send His spirit to you during your grief filled moments.
When I lost my son, over 24 for years ago, a wise person told me that a mother’s grief is like the ocean. The grief my rise and recede like the tide, it will swell like a giant wave and sometimes it may be smooth as glass. But, justs like the ocean, it is always there. That was strangely comforting to me then, and I pray it is comforting to you now.
God bless you in your moments of pure joy and in your moments of pure grief.
Samantha Herrington
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Dear Stephanie,
Your words are a good reminder that no one truly knows the depth of pain or joy in someone’s heart–only God really knows, and I’m thankful that he understands our deepest feelings. I pray that he will give you a deep peace in the midst of your grief or your joy, as you keep clinging to him.
Just Monday I asked a group to pray for a friend whose prematurely born son just died–it was her third loss. One of the women later told me she too had lost a baby and the resource that helped her was a book, “Mommy, Please Don’t Cry: There Are No Tears in Heaven” by Linda Deymaz.
My heart is heavy today for all who have suffered the loss of a child.
God’s peace,
Diane
Dear Stephanie,
Your words are a good reminder that no one truly knows the depth of pain or joy in someone’s heart–only God really knows, and I’m thankful that he understands our deepest feelings. I pray that he will give you a deep peace in the midst of your grief or your joy, as you keep clinging to him.
Just Monday I asked a group to pray for a friend whose prematurely born son just died–it was her third loss. One of the women later told me she too had lost a baby and the resource that helped her was a book, “Mommy, Please Don’t Cry: There Are No Tears in Heaven” by Linda Deymaz.
My heart is heavy today for all who have suffered the loss of a child.
God’s peace,
Diane